Year end blog post

I seriously don't know where to start, because first of all, I didn't feel the breeze of Christmas nor the New Year at all.

21st. Going to Bicol.
Here's a photo of me with my bf inside the bus. Hinatid niya lang naman ako

Question: do you agree that my bf looks gay? Cos I do.. 

A poem for my late mommy

Listening to the song of Danny,

suddenly thought about my mommy.

And why my eyes are getting teary?

Oh my mommy I miss you badly.

Sun rises and the telephone rings,

saying she'll take me to her office.

Inside the car, sitting beside her,

I end up spending the night with her.

Peace offering

I might be just over thinking

that hurts your innocent feelings

May not be aware of wrong doings

but you to me is my everything

The pain I gave I know will stay

but let me fade those feelings away

Give me a chance to let me stay

cos I know you'll be my man someday

Celebrating our 2nd Anniversary!

Hello Caramoan!!

First day.
I've got nothing to tell to you guys but the place is just so awesome!

We'll get through it

We're in a weird stage right now...and I don't know how to handle it.
To tell you honestly, I'm so confused with our relationship right now. It's like we're already comfortable with each other that we already forgot the relationship that we had. Oh well, I'm visiting you as long as I have enough time..we're eating together...sleep together.... then all of a sudden, with just a misunderstanding, it's like we already forget who we really are and what's the relationship between us. We're totally fucked up....or should I say...I just suck.

him

lol. I just love him. Although I really don't know the reason why I love him at first..well it doesn't matter, lol..as long as I'm happy being with him..then let it be..lol..so I guess that's the reason why I love him..his presence. lmao.

B1 & B2

I actually don't know what I am feeling right now. I mean, yes, I love my boyfriend..we have been together since Ayee's post birthday celebration which is dated last May 7, 2011. From the day I said yes to him. I feel so damn happy.

Look, here's the scenario..
He got my attention last December 2010 I guess..but I don't have a crush on him, I was still inlove with Cappucino by then.
The second one that he got my attention was when my co-worker said that "gwapuhon man palan si Gatz". So I looked at him and then I suddenly agreed to my co-worker's side comment about him.
Then I got on crush on him from the day he talked to me after we fought..we didn't actually fight, we just had a misunderstanding. haha,  "hindi niya ko nun pinapansin and hindi ko din naman siya pinapansin, kasi sinabunutan ko siya kasi tawa siya ng tawa, tapos tinatanong ko kung bakit, hindi niya sinasabi, eh feeling ko naman napapahiya na ko kaya sinabunutan ko siya, kaya hindi kami nagpansinan simula nun " haha. And yes, I just realized that I got a crush on him since then and developed with him also because we've been seeing each other everyday because he's my co-worker. But, I admit it that I still love Chino..err BH rather. lmao

i am thinking of..

Cappucino
Lol.. I don't wanna fall in love with him cos I am not sure if he really loves me. Cos if he loves me, well, he'll exert an effort for me to give him a chance even if I say NO to him. Yes, I said NO cos hello, he was just saying he loves me when he's drunk..he's not saying those words when he's not drunk so that's quite confusing if he really loves me or not right?? I actually asked for a sign that..if he say that he loves me when he's sober, Imma give him a chance..yet..I still want to see his effort. haha.

random places. random jamming

USI

I went to USI at around 11am to eat. haha. lol. What I mean is that, my former classmates/college friends had an activity, an on-premise catering and they need me to be their visitor who will eat the meals that they cooked..here are the photos..

I missed being with them and cooking with them as well

quite confusing

I was shocked. lol. Not that very shocked cos I was kinda expecting that too..but I was very shocked on the stupid conversation we had..rofl :P

It's my co-worker's birthday celebration last 20th of February..he's one of my closest co-worker in Sutherland. I honestly like him. he's the first guy whom I first get along with from the day I started working..oh..from the day I started my training for work..

He's awesome yet kinda bully..in a good way..but sometimes..I really don't get him if he's serious in his jokes or not..lol

the BLACKSHEEP side of me

At home.
I'm not expressive. I'm pretentious. I'm always in the bad mood. Very private. Very silent. Take jokes seriously. Loner. Selfish. Devilish. Unsociable. Indifferent. Sarcastic.

Hell yea..that's my characteristics when I'm at home. I dunno why..it's just that..I don't like being so sweet to my parents unlike my annoying sister. I'm really not expressive. And I'm always getting mad at them even in a super duper small reason..

random truths

Worst Birthday Ever
Well first, I'm not that happy on my 18th Birthday..
My wish was granted..but not the exotic foods, it's the Alcohol Party..Although one of my wishes were granted, I'm still not contented cos I didn't able to celebrate my 18th Birthday with my TRUEPA..
And second..he really didn't greet me on my Birthday even in Facebook. jeeezz, I will not assume anymore.

10 months of admiring and still counting.

It's my first time to love a guy like this.

I've never been into a serious relationship.

Never been into real commitments.

Had no experience with true love at all.

I was expecting that you'll be my first.

Expecting that you'll be my guy.

But why did this effing things happened?

I'm not used to it. But I have to be strong.

lame post. lol

Let's say you have a group of friends..not only a group of friends when you were a high school student but your new found friends when you step in on college life.
Of course, you and your college friends will be able to become more closer because you always see each other everyday just like high school. Then you and your friends grow more..so during your first year college of being together..you guys ended up a group of friends then..

Then you guys are now incoming second year student..but two of your friends won't study in your school anymore because the two of them will transfer to the other school yet they stopped studying the first sem cos they didn't easily get the transcipt so they have no choice but to not study in the first sem as a second year high school student.

Well, do you think the college friends of the two students who stopped studying in the first sem will still be able to have communication to their college friends?
Yes..of course they will. The two of them and their college friends hang out sometimes whenever everyone of them are available..it's a good thing because even though the two of them stopped, they always find a way for them to hang out with their college friends.

immature much

I take a nap after I ate my lunch, then I woke up at around past 5pm. And I don't know why I'm feeling weird by the time I woke up. I keep on thinking why I woke up with those feelings but I'm pretty sure that it's all about being alone or sadness that I'm feeling lately. I even can't eat well my dinner because of what I'm feeling right now. Oh seriously, I'm actually feeling weird since this morning after I woke up but I ignored it first, but for the second time around after I woke up in the afternoon, I know that there's something wrong with myself. I was like, what's wrong with the day today?..What's wrong with 11?..or better yet..What's wrong with me? It is so weird..really really weird...

heart-touching

via tumblr

I was posting my typography on tumblr and spamming some posts too when this one gets my attention.
I don't usually read texts on tumblr cos it's kinda boring and because typography and photography only was my passion on tumblr. But, I saw a text and found myself reading that one, and after I read that text. It strangely touches my heart. It really touches my heart. It made me realize that some other people might be able to violate rules for the sake of their loved ones even though they know that violating rules might lead them to some punishments. The officer was very kind-hearted. He's very understanding. I salute him whoever he is (:

He broke my heart

I log on to my Facebook account

scanning and reading my news feeds on my home page

I saw his name

I was expecting his new post on his status

assuming that his status is dedicated to me..

My heart is beating fast

my eyes are slowly moving next to his name

and to my dismay..

he's now in a relationship.

I feel like my heart stops for a moment

and feeling like I'm so damn weak 
Guess what?
He's everything I could ever wish for :((

I still can't forget him.

I can't help but think of him each day, and I don't know why I can't get rid of it. I have to be positive. I have to forget him as much as I can, and I have to move on..I really have to move on.

Damn! I have to fucking move on!

patience is all I need right now.

oh come on guys, you just really don't understand why I can't make it. And besides, it's really awkward, yes..awkward. Sorry but I just don't have the guts to say that I feel really awkward with you guys. You know what happened just this summer and it really makes me feel shy. I'm so sorry. I ask an apology cos I know that I'm the cause of "that matter", but, admit it, you guys have done wrong too. It's not me whose the one who done it all but you guys too, especially YOU. But oh well, I shouldn't have to open this topic anymore because I know that we all threw it away.

Bout the gatherings I'm about to go with you guys, ..I'm so sorry, I really can't join, although I know that you'll understand it if I'll open it to you guys, but in my part, I don't have the nerve to say it to you guys that's why I didn't come with you, cos I feel shy to open it you. Hope you'll understand. As usual I want to join cos I'm missing you guys already, but like what I've said, I have my reason that's why I can't make it.

Since I owe a lot to you guys, I'll promise you that if the time comes that I already have what I don't have right now, I'll surely make it up to you guys. So please just stay calm and don't thought me of a negative attitudes cos I know that you guys know that I am not like that.

my thoughts

So, how are you my dear blogger? It's been a while since I've updated you, teehee!
Oh, I've got an award from Sasha :) Thank you my dear affie :D

 

Btw, I heard the news about the hostage taking happened this day at Quirino Grandstand. I feel sorry to all the Chinese victims of Capt. Mendoza. hayy. I feel shy to other countries who heard the news. It's almost the latest topic around the world! Golly, 'panu to nagawa ng isang Pulis na Pinoy?? hayy, because of this hostage drama, the Philippines has already have a bad image to other countries. Although I pity the hostage taker and I understand him why he done this hostage drama, still, he hasn't supposed to kill those Chinese because they only wants to enjoy and have some adventure in Philippines. hayy. My country is chaotic already, I feel like I don't want to be a pinay anymore..I was like..OMG, I gotta go migrate to other country and forget the life that I had with Philippines as soon as possible :((

May mga bagay na minsan gusto mo ng itigil:

• Pag-aaral
• Trabaho
• Relasyon
• Paghinga

Pero naisip mo bigla, nakakatamad din kumilos para maisakatuparan ang pagtigil mong ito. Minsan kasi, nakakasawa yung steady lang. O di kaya naman, ako lang yun. Ayoko ng steady. Ayoko ng madali. Ayoko ng hindi ako umuunlad bilang estudyante, manggagawa, tao. Nakakainis isipin na ang dali kong magsawa, pero ganon talaga e, kung walang matibay na hawak na pumipigil sa bigla kong pagalis, hindi talaga ako mananatili sa isang bagay, tao, lugar, trabaho at kung ano ano pang hinihingi sa akin ang oras ko.
Matutulog na lang ako.

Pero hindi pa nga pala ko matutulog, hindi nga pala kasi ko nakakatulog pag mga ganitong oras >.<